Out of the Blue
by The Light of Reason
Summary: It was a beautiful summer day; the kind he hated. He hadn't planned on any evil doing, but their chance meeting inspired him. He vowed Roxanne Ritchie would rue the day she underestimated him...and she planned to make him regret ruining her date.
1. A Chance Meeting

_Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, they are property of Dreamworks stuidios. However, I hope you enjoy the story!  
>PS-fixed the typos. Sorry about that!<em>

It was a bright, cloudless day in Metro City, the streets bustling in the late afternoon with cheerful people freed from their suffocating jobs and either heading home or to the bars for happy hour. The air was alight with the scent of early summer flowers, sprinkling the city with a faint shower of sweet, golden pollen as birds chirped gaily overhead. The excited sound of voices formed a buzzing that filled his ears as he walked down the crowded sidewalk. It was sunny, summer days like this that he despised.

Megamind was on his way to the local newsstand, hoping to find his photo on the cover after his recent release from prison. And by release, he meant _escape_ from prison. He had been out for three days without a single police officer coming after him, which was…unusual. Granted, this was his first public stroll since he had been apprehended two and a half months ago, so it was really only a matter of time until his evil presence was again noticed. In the meantime, he planned to cause enough mayhem to make up for his shoddy last quarter before the police seized him again. Today, he was off the clock, on his way to pick up the paper and then maybe some pastries to thank Minion for the excellent help in his "release".

He strode at a leisurely pace down the sidewalk, glaring at anyone who looked at him longer than an acceptable 1.26 seconds in passing. People were apt to stare because although he wore dark sunglasses and a hood as a disguise, his light blue skin and dashing good looks were a dead give away to his identity. Honestly, blow up a major monument and suddenly everyone stares at you like you're some kind of maniac! He lifted his pointed chin, regarding coolly a tall, familiar building two blocks ahead of him. Glancing at his wrist, he saw that it was almost half past five, and that meant the majority of the worker bees would be staggering out the doors of their offices in mere minutes, weighed down my the tasks they had been bombarded with all day. That's why it paid to be the boss, he thought.

As he passed by the gleaming glass doors of an investment company tower, he wondered whether he should swing by the coffee shop on Main street for their devastatingly delicious biscottis, or the smaller café four blocks down between the Laundromat and the paint your own plate business where they had the greatest cinnamon buns he had ever tasted. He made himself a mental note that if he did venture there, he would definitely enter the paint a plate shop, browse for a moment, then slam the door relatively hard behind him in hopes of destroying at least a shelf of those nasty clay plates. Really, who would want to display something so tacky in their home? The very thought was below his very high, intellectual taste.

As he drew up to the KMCP 8 TV building that loomed so high over the city that it entirely blocked out the sun on this bright afternoon, a woman in a magenta blazer and skirt dipped out of the revolving glass doors, her short brunette hair bobbing with her purposeful gait. Megamind sneered, deeming this coincidence a gift from fate on this otherwise mundane afternoon. He'd have to get her attention.

"Look who's blowing out of work early!" he greeted loudly, and he saw the shoulders of the woman stiffen as she stopped in the middle of the traffic flow, inviting him to draw nearer. Slowly, she turned on her heel, her lips pursed in annoyance as she popped her hip with attitude and gave him a displeased look.

"Let me guess, you decided to be a gentleman today and wait until my workday was over to kidnap me so as not to draw me away from my job," Roxanne Ritchie said sardonically, her pale blue irises outlined into jagged icicles by her long dark lashes. He laughed in his throat darkly, amused by her witty banter.

"Miss Ritchie, I am not interested in your mediocre, mind-numbing tasks, nor to I schedule myself around them. I was not intending upon your capture this evening any more than I was planning to pass your building the very moment you left. I have much more important plans this evening," Megamind said with mocking patience used commonly when talking to irritating children. Anger flared in Roxanne's eyes for a moment at the disrespectful comment, then just as suddenly died and she smiled tightly, tilting her head to the side.

"That's wonderful," Roxanne said as she slung her purse over her shoulder and Megamind smiled slightly, raising his eyebrows as if to say, 'Oh really?' Adjusting the lapel of her blazer, she continued merrily, "Because I was just on my way home to get ready for a date." A messy organ chord reserved for the most dramatic and shocking moments in films sounded in Megamind's head, and his lips melted from a condescending smile into a pinched line of resentment, his eyes darkening. Roxanne's smile was triumphant as she began to walk backwards, saying coyly, "I haven't made any plans past dinner and dancing but…you know how those things are. There's no telling whose bed I'll be in tomorrow morning."

With a suggestive smile, she spun around and clicked down the street with a spring in her step, swallowed seconds later by the mass of citizens. Megamind stood there long after she disappeared, his jaw clenched in resolve as he mulled over her words.

Well, that settled it. He'd pick up the daily paper, call Minion and go to the café called Rosaline's to get a dozen cinnamon buns. That was plenty of time for Roxanne to get dressed up for her date and then have her bubble burst when he and Minion showed up to capture her.


	2. Change of Plans

_Disclaimer: I do not own Megamind, the characters belong to Dreamworks.  
>What did you think of the last chapter? Good! This chapter isn't extremely interesting, but...well, I like it, so it stays! :) Enjoy!<em>

The stall clerk cowered to the ground in fear, his eyes squeezed shut. Megamind apathetically regarded the frightened man as he shielded his greying head with his hands, his words muffled by his starched shirt as he begged, "Please, don't hurt me! I-I have a family! Two kids, and a sick wife!"

Megamind didn't acknowledge his plead; he had heard similar stories before, and he was immune to such pathetic blubbering. The villain turned his back on the fuming newsstand and drawled cruelly, "Grammatical accuracy is one of the few merits that journalists possess. Be sure to tell your publisher that Megamind has no _space_ in it." He tucked his ray-gun into the holster at his hip as he sauntered away, leaving the tiny newsstand billowing with smoke. Giving the front page of the paper a lazy look, he tossed it to the ground, water from a nearby storm drain seeping into the paper instantly. He was in a foul mood, and he needed to engage in some intelligent conversation. Megamind withdrew a cellular phone from his pocket and quickly dialled the lair.

Minion was painting the interior of the lair a rich navy blue in a matte finish, a job he had been putting off for weeks as he planned his master's escape when the phone rang. Dropping the roller brush into its paint tray, he raced to the phone, picking up after the second ring.

"Hello?" Megamind smiled as the voice of his minion and closest friend filled the lonely gap at the other end of the phone line. It was time to unveil his newest evil plot.

"Change of plans, Minion," Megamind said, skipping the chitchat as he marched quickly down the street. "We won't be redesigning the Brainbots tonight." Minion's shoulders fell in disappointment; he had been looking forward to this all day. There was nothing more fun than playing with the Brainbots while his master altered the blueprints. It was like playing with puppies…granted, most puppies didn't have laser beams that shot out of their foreheads, but only very rarely did anyone get hurt.

"Why not?" Minion asked, trying not to whine as he rested his bionic hand tiredly on his hip. Megamind was about to respond when he witnessed a golden opportunity: a man carrying a tower of boxes was trying to negotiate his was through the throng of people flowing down the sidewalk just feet away from him. The villain stopped abruptly and stuck his foot out, tripping the man and sending the stack of boxes tumbling into the open doorway of a florist's shop. Stepping quickly around the mess, Megamind continued on his path and replied, "We'll be too busy executing the kidnapping of Roxanne Ritchie."

"Isn't that a little risky, sir? I mean, you only got out a few days ago," Minion cautioned as he cradled the receiver between his fishbowl and his shoulder, his voice expressing concern. Megamind pondered this for a moment, then the image of Roxanne's satisfied smirk popped into his head again, her certainty, her attitude; hardly the picture of a helpless captive. He would set that straight. His brows lowered and he said curtly into the receiver, "Villains have no inhibitions. Make sure the paint job is complete by the time I'm done at Rosaline's Café, then meet me at the fountain by city hall with the invisible car. Oh, and Minion…"

The fish perked up, waiting for a simple thank you, maybe even a compliment. It had been a long time since he had gotten any appreciation, because even though the Brainbots were sweet, they had a limited vocabulary, not to mention synthetic emotions.

"Iron my good cape and take it with you. This is a special occasion, and I must look my best." Minion's shoulders sunk even lower and his fish bowl drooped downward, his hopes for a little appreciation dashed.

"No problemo, boss," Minion chirped with feigned excitement as he raised his roller brush, sighing as the phone clicked off in response. "I still think it's a bad idea," he mumbled as he set the phone down, then continued coating the wall before him with the dark matte paint. Minion noticed a Brainbot floating idly by him, and he held out his hand to pet it, whistling to get the robot's attention. The Brainbot suddenly emitted a loud siren sound and aimed its laser at him; the room quickly filled with other Brainbots that heard the signal, each pointing a red laser at him. He raised his hands in defence and called out, "Minion!"

The voice recognition must have worked, because the Brainbots were on standby again, floating peacefully around the room like leaves in a light breeze. He released a gush of air in relief and returned to his painting, muttering, "That was close. I forgot they were oversensitive to high pitched sounds." He would remember not to whistle _Bye Bye, Birdie_ anymore, or else it could be bye bye, Minion. He frowned at the partially painted wall, realizing that if he was going to finish in time, he would need an extra set of hands…

Or maybe a robot army. He smiled to himself and turned to face the swarm of Brainbots that flitted about the room. His chest puffed out like a commander, Minion straightened his posture and ordered in a booming voice to the Brainbots, "Let's get this place painted! Come on, move it!"

The Brainbots swiftly obeyed, each taking up a spare brush and painting the bare patches on the walls. Minion nodded proudly at his authority and returned to his own task, humming this time to avoid startling the Brainbots. He would have to remember to recalibrate their sensors tomorrow, or else it could spell out disaster. Megamind, he knew, liked to whistle in the shower.


	3. Alien Abduction

_Disclaimer: I do not own these characters, they belong to Dreamworks._

_So, here's the big kidnapping scene! I hope you like it _:D

"Shoot!" Roxanne griped as she smudged her eyeliner for the third time in a row. Emitting an annoyed sigh, she squeezed a small amount of eye make-up remover onto a tissue and drew it in a smooth line, erasing the offending black smear from below her sleek eyebrow.

"Let's try this again," she mumbled to herself, taking in a deep breath through her nose as she turned the pencil in its sharpener to ensure the finest point possible. She had been distracted since she met Megamind in the street less than an hour ago, smudging her eyeliner, cutting her ankle when she was shaving, and accidently brushing her teeth twice. The thought that at any moment she could be scooped up and tied to a chair didn't frighten her anymore; unfortunately, the paranoia would definitely put a damper on her evening. She was going out with Rick, the current events announcer KMCP and the newest member of their broadcasting team and, honestly, the most attractive anchor at the studio. She didn't pin her hopes on this date, but it was a nice opportunity to finally spend time with someone who didn't have superpowers or a twisted love of assembling destructive machines.

Roxanne hummed to herself softly as she lined her eye with a perfectly even stroke, smiling at her reflection. She found the fragrance she reserved for outings such as this and spritzed her neck with the light floral scent. Needless to say, said bottle was fairly full, considering she averaged two dates a year with her current kidnappee status. She smoothed the front of her dress and looked herself over, making sure she was presentable. Nodding at her reflection approvingly, she flicked off the bathroom light and opened the door, considering the numerous benefits of a small glass of white wine before Rick arrived.

Roxanne started in surprise when a pair of very strong, very hairy arms surrounded her middle, and she was lifted clear off the floor. The behemoth snapped a set of manacles on her wrists and ankles, then threw her over his shoulder before she could even take in a breath to scream. At this point, he had such a tight grip on her waist, she couldn't make a sound even if she wanted to. His arm wrapped solidly around her waist, the abductor exited the apartment via the fire escape, stopping to courteously turn off the lamp that was still illuminated by the window. Roxanne bounced on the broad shoulder of the creature as he swung down from railing to railing in gorilla style, landing with a soft thud on the sidewalk below.

She released a surprised "Oof!" when she was dumped on the back seat of a dark car, although her captor's hands were gentler when they buckled her seatbelt. The door slammed shut, and moments later the large, hulking figure took to the driver's seat, latching himself in and pulling expertly away from the curb. The strong scent of cinnamon filled the cramped car and an open white box was thrust toward Roxanne, containing sticky, gooey cinnamon buns.

"Care for a cinnamon bun, Miss Ritchie?" the person in the passenger's seat asked her casually, not even turning his head to look at her. The nerve!

"Megamind!" Roxanne exclaimed, her voice thick with annoyance. Sensing she wasn't in the mood for culinary delights, Megamind withdrew the bakery box and set it upon his lap, inhaling their sugary sweet aroma contentedly. They just beat their previous record for fastest capture; it was a good day.

Roxanne's annoyance dissolved, replaced swiftly by a question that practically oozed sarcasm. "What happened to your 'important plans'?" She demanded, verbally placing air quotes around the last two words.

This time Megamind craned his neck to face her, lowering his sunglasses to reveal his piercing green eyes. She was wearing a new strapless dress, turquoise in hue, with a sweetheart neckline in tulle and a silk skirt. Her fresh skin glowed beneath the minimal light that came in through the window from the streetlamps as they roared down the lane, and she smelled like a bouquet of lilacs. Very impressive.

"I'm a villain, Miss Ritchie," he replied simply after his appraisal of her attire. "I lie." When she responded with a glare, he carelessly pushed the sunglasses up the bridge of his nose and turned to the windshield, the back of his light blue, domed head peeking over the seat. Behind his dark lenses Megamind frowned, puzzled by the bare emotion he just witnessed. Certainly Roxanne had never been taken with the idea of regular kidnappings, but this was the first time she seemed truly angry at him. Peculiar.


	4. Tea Time

_Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Megamind, they belong to Dreamworks._

_Here's another chapter, all ready for you! I hope you like it!_

"Have a seat," Megamind ordered as he, Roxanne and Minion entered a large, dark room with few furnishings besides a hard wooden chair and a large, red wing-back chair that faced a wooden desk against the wall on the far side of the room. The only illumination was a bright spotlight that beamed down from the high ceiling onto the lone wooden chair in the centre of the room, creating a pool of light that reached out five feet in all directions. Roxanne was deposited soundly on the uncomfortable wooden chair, still cuffed on hand and foot. She squinted against the harsh light, barely making out Megamind's figure as marched to the desk that was presumably his, drew a large rolled up paper from its tube-shaped container and spread it open, examining it avidly.

In an attempt to lighten the mood, Minion decided to make Roxanne more comfortable. "Would you like some tea, Miss Ritchie?" Minion asked politely, fluttering in his bowl with nervous energy as he waited for a reply. Megamind slammed the sheet he was studying a moment ago down on his desk to emphasize his aggravation, turning his head violently in their direction.

"Minion! We do _not_ offer out captives refreshments!" He scolded, his shrill tone reminding Roxanne more of a grumpy old woman than a brilliant villain, and she bit back a laugh. For what it was worth, she thought Megamind's expressions and dramatic manner of speaking could be quite amusing, even though he held her hostage on multiple occasions. Roxanne, knowing how easily Megamind overreacted, ignored his outburst and turned to Minion, smiling at the henchman sweetly.

"I'd love a cup of tea with milk and two cubes of sugar, thank you," she answered calmly, and Megamind released an irritated growl, forcefully plunking himself down in the red chair. The tall back of the chair hid his head, but she could picture him sitting there with his chin resting on his chest and his arms folded sulkily, his mouth drooped in a scowl. In a flash, his behaviour went from that of a senior citizen to a pouty child who didn't get his way, and again she had to fight the urge to laugh.

"Don't mind him, he's just been moody lately," Minion advised as he nodded wisely, and Roxanne felt her eyes drawn to Megamind's chair again. His voice quiet and animated, Minion continued, "He was so eager to get back to wrong-doing that he got carried away and skipped his usual courtesy."

What courtesy? Roxanne felt like asking, but she found herself wondering if it would be frustrating as a villain to have an uncooperative victim and a super hero constantly ruining your plans. Time and time again, Megamind's plots were foiled, but she hadn't ever considered this would make him feel depressed. Wait…was she really experiencing compassion for her kidnapper? Minion snapped Roxanne out of her thoughts by clapping his hands together excitedly, and just in time—her thoughts were venturing into unwanted territory. Roxanne gave Minion her full attention as he said briskly, "One tea with milk and two sugars, coming up!" He traipsed out of the room, murmuring earnestly to himself and Roxanne smiled fondly. In spite of his hand in her kidnapping, she couldn't help but like Minion, who was good-natured and loyal to a fault.

She took the moment alone to survey the room around her. The walls were bare and there was not a single computer monitor in sight, which was all uncharacteristic; however, judging by the room's location, she came to the conclusion it was the same room she had been in the last time Megamind captured her. Her reporter's nose told her that the room had been painted, and because the walls were sticky they couldn't return everything to its place before she arrived. That, and the fact she was smacked in the face by the powerful odour of paint when Minion carried her in earlier.

"Here you go, nice and hot!" Minion announced grandly, pushing the kitchen door open with his foot. He ushered a tray topped by a teacup and matching saucer, a silver spoon, a small milk pitcher and a bowl of sugar cubes to Roxanne then expertly balanced the tray on one hand, raising the milk in the other. His voice bright, he told Roxanne eagerly, "Say when."

A cascade of milk surged into her cup and she quickly said, "That's enough, thanks." Minion replaced the milk pitcher on the tray then plopped two small sugar cubes into the teacup, gently stirring it with the dainty silver spoon. Thankfully, Roxanne's hands were chained in front of her so when Minion handed her the teacup on its saucer, it was relatively simple to take the cup and raise it to her lips. She blew the steam away before taking a delicate sip, smiling as the warmth spread in her belly. Minion was a wonderful host.

"How have you been?" Roxanne asked as she crossed one leg over the other, leaning forward intently. The fish brightened, pleased that someone took an interest in him, and kneeled on the floor in front of her.

"Busy as usual," he replied, rolling his eyes and smiling tiredly. As he told Roxanne about his adventures, Megamind sat in his chair, massaging his massive forehead with his fingers. Leave it to Minion to befriend the enemy, the evil genius thought to himself as he twisted his mouth in annoyance. It was just ridiculous! This made Megamind's resolve against Roxanne even greater; he would not be so seduced by her _siren call_.

"And then what happened?" Roxanne said to Minion with interest, and she was almost certain she heard a pained groan coming from the other side of the room. Roxanne glanced at Megamind's chair and suppressed a smile, knowing that he would be positively fuming at Minion's behaviour. She was determined to make him wish he had never ruined her date night.


	5. I'm Not the Hero

_Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of Megamind, they belong to Dreamworks._

_Summary: It's a surprise! _:)

Roxanne laughed in bell tones as Minion conversationally recounted the stories of his various steps in renovating the lair, her empty teacup resting on her lap. Minion's retellings were elaborate and expressive, most likely exaggerated, but nonetheless a comedic distraction from her present situation. It almost made her forget the handcuffs…_almost_.

"So we were thinking of moving the control centre for the Brainbots to the storage room on the second floor," Minion explained to set the scene for his next tale, fluttering energetically in his bowl. "You remember where we keep the snapping turtles and the eel tank, right? Well, just yesterday when I was feeding the snapping turtles and the boss was surveying the room to decide on the renovations, he dropped his blueprints on the floor." Minion began to giggle and he continued through gasps of laughter, "When he bent over to pick them up, a turtle came up behind him and bit him right on the—"

"Enough, Minion." The ethereally calm voice was so sudden that both Roxanne and Minion jumped in surprise, having forgotten Megamind was still in the room. His voice subdued and dark, he said from the fortress of his arm chair, "Minion, I would like to be alone with Miss Ritchie."

For a second, Minion stood there motionless; he had never been asked to leave. Finally, he stammered, "Y-yes, Sir," in reply, hastily taking Roxanne's cup from her limp hands and bowing out of the room. Based on Minion's reaction, Roxanne concluded that this abrupt calm was foreboding and gooseflesh rose on her skin; she had never been alone with Megamind before. She wordlessly watched his chair, unable to see him where he sat shielded by his chair and the darkness enveloping him. The silence sat heavily between them like lead, and Roxanne's patience wore thin as she waited for him to say something, _anything_. Thirty seconds passed, then forty five. A minute. A minute and a half…

The quiet unbearable, Roxanne took in a breath and demanded rudely, "Why am I here? Of all nights to choose from, why did you pick this one?"

Megamind smiled to himself; he had been waiting for this question since they had pulled away from the curb at her apartment, and he had a delicious answer prepared. He rose erectly from the hulking chair he occupied, gliding over the floor with a whoosh of his cape to the outskirts of her pool of light. As he addressed her, he smiled with satisfaction, replying plainly, "Because you asked me not to."

"Mature," Roxanne retorted as she covertly tested her bonds, confirming that she was bound as tightly as she had suspected. The chances of overpowering him by means of strength were slim, and he had Minion on his side; that only left her with the hope of stalling long enough for someone to realize she was missing and deduce she had been kidnapped by Megamind. She figured that would take a couple hours with Metro Man out of town, but she had plenty of material ready. She had been waiting for an opportunity to get inside Megamind's head for a _long_ time. Her eyes sharp, Roxanne asked, "Why don't you kidnap someone else for once? You know, to spice things up a bit?"

Without warning, Megamind released a delighted laugh and strode elegantly into the island of light in the middle of the room. His voice relaxed, he replied as he came to a halt at Roxanne's side, "Not only are you the closest person to Metro Man, but I also quite enjoy your company."

He _enjoyed_ her company? She shivered, feeling like her captor could see right through her, and she shifted to the edge of her chair in preparation of a mad bolt to the door. She then remembered the shackles connecting her ankles and growled impatiently in the back of her throat. He voice haughty, Roxanne retorted, "Well, I find these kidnappings terribly boring and predictable. It's the same time after time: You capture me and pose empty threats, then Metro Man flies in, defeating you and whisking me away into the sunset. It's played out. You've lost your touch."

She injected just enough venom into her last sentence in the hopes of getting under his skin. To her disappointment, Megamind merely pursed his lips in thought, stepping around her chair and strolling aimlessly away. He found such feedback from a victim helpful; after all, even perfection must be updated on occasion. His back to her, he absentmindedly stroked a stray Brainbot that had wandered in a moment ago and he asked her, "What do you suggest I do?"

This question was unanticipated and for a few seconds Roxanne lost the ability to speak. She wasn't an expert on villainy, but she had enough experience in the field to know it was unusual, if not frowned upon, for a villain to ask their captive to decide their own punishment. Roxanne reached up uncomfortably to scratch her head, and frowned when something hard struck her hand. It took a second for her to figure out it was a well concealed bobby pin, and as she lowered her hand, she inconspicuously slid the bobby pin from her hair, closing her fingers around it discreetly. If Megamind wanted to play games, she wouldn't disappoint.

"For starters, you should release me and take me back to my apartment so I might have a chance of apologizing to my date," Roxanne replied, expecting to send Megamind sulking off to Minion. Instead, he tilted his head back and chortled as he vanished in the deep shadows on the dark outer fringe of the room.

His laugh echoed off the freshly painted walls and bounced menacingly in her eardrums, but his silent footfalls were inaudible even when she strained her ears. The only noise in the room was her own uneven breath, which sounded obnoxiously loud in the cavernous room. She sat tensely in her seat, awaiting Megamind's reappearance from the dark ring surrounding her. Suddenly, Roxanne felt the tickle of warm breath on her ear and Megamind's murmured huskily, "Oh, Miss Ritchie, what _am_ I going to do with you?"

The hairs at the nape of her neck stood on end and her body seized up, her shallow breath shaking her shoulders. If she hadn't been shackled and in the presence of her greatest antagonist, Roxanne may have found the comment alluring; however, the only sensible emotion she could muster was annoyance, which she used like a crutch.

"Why don't you go after Metro Man's parents, or his school friends? I'm not the only person he knows," Roxanne appealed again, squinting at the clock on the far wall that read 7:43. Rick had no doubt been waiting at the restaurant for the past forty five minutes, and would probably wait at least another half hour. She felt a lump of guilt settle in her chest like a medicine ball, weighing down her thoughts. Megamind, unaware of her worries, continued nonchalantly with a wave of his hand, "Merely a habit, I suppose. I personally find you much more fascinating than Metro Man's other associates."

Two compliments in one sitting? This was the last straw! Roxanne looked him directly in the eye and demanded forcefully, "What do you _want_ from me?"

Megamind paused pensively to collect his thoughts; then, he began a spiel he had no doubt been working on for a long time.

"I, Miss Ritchie, await the day that you will realize that sokeeity, not I, is your oppressor," he began, ruining the theatrical aspect of his speech by mispronouncing 'society'. Roxanne rolled her eyes but refrained from pointing out his error, listening tolerantly as she shifted the bobby pin in her sweaty palm.

"I await the day you will call for a hero to rescue you from the limitations and subjugation your inadequate career places on you, a woman of great intellect and spirit. I await the day you will realize that you deserve to be recognized for your intelligence and abilities, not just your pretty face; when you will break free of the shackles your monotonous life has imprisoned you with."

He hesitated dramatically, pacing evenly toward her as he continued, "I await the day when the hero you call to release you from this life of being intellectually degraded will not be Metro Man but I, the one who fully appreciates your talents."

Roxanne's heart drummed faster and her mouth went dry, a flush warming the back of her neck. All these years, Roxanne thought she was a prop Megamind used to get to Metro Man, the incentive to lure Megamind's prize right into his clutches; now, Roxanne wasn't sure whether she was the bait or the prize.

Megamind dropped into a crouch in front of her fluidly and for the second time that evening she stared him directly in the eye, an impossibly brilliant jade that didn't belong on earth. His hands hovered over her kneecaps and he finished in a low, sincere voice:

"I await the day you will choose me over Metro Man."

Roxanne sat numbly with his final words ringing in her ears, her face expressionless as cement. Although Megamind meant all of this in a professional way, Roxanne was aware of an underlying meaning that she didn't want to dwell on. The desire he expressed didn't repulse her, but the imbalance of power and its implications worried Roxanne. Megamind searched her face earnestly for a reaction, but when he found his search fruitless, he rose to his feet discontentedly. What a waste of an evil monologue! He exhaled loudly though his nose, then turned his back on Roxanne and said like he hadn't just revealed his motive for kidnapping her, "I'll call Minion. Perhaps he will have an idea."

She wasn't afraid of Minion; in fact, he could pass for one of her friends if he didn't continually aid in her kidnapping. However, Roxanne knew that in order to stall Megamind, she needed him alone and vulnerable, because she _was_ going home that night, whether by means of escape or rescue. And he had just unknowingly given her some prime inspiration for a distraction, one that would exercise all her skills as a TV personality. She was no actress, but it took a certain amount of talent to keep a smile plastered on her face for hours at a time. The plan quickly formed in her head and she called out, "Wait!"

Megamind ignored her as he walked away, applauding himself for his cold indifference. He wasn't going to be made a fool of again by his victim, especially not some temptress with ocean colored eyes and voluptuous curves. He was much too professional to be duped by her dirty tricks.

To save her sinking ship, Roxanne licked her lips and ventured again more boldly, "What if that day was today?"

Megamind froze in his tracks, recognizing the reference Roxanne made to his speech. After an endless moment, he slowly turned to face her, his chin and eyebrows raised expectantly in an "I'm waiting?" expression. She kept quiet, letting the tension intensify. He regarded her for what could have been anywhere between fifteen seconds and 20 minutes; at last, a lofty smile spread over his lips and he shook his head as he chided, "Lies do not become you, Miss Ritchie. Stick to the truth."

He turned on his heel and Roxanne blurted desperately, "I'm willing to prove it!"

He stopped again and returned his appraising gaze to her. His face showed amusement: the smirk on his lips; the way his nose was tilted upward; the crinkle of his patronizing brow. As if she was some _spectacle_ that he could use at his pleasure. She resolved to wipe that smug look right off his face.

"_How_," he intoned exaggeratedly, striding with poise back to her seat, "do you intend to prove this?"

To give Megamind a taste of his own cryptic answers, Roxanne replied with a rhetorical question of her own: "How have people been showing their affection for each other for thousands of years?"

At first, he gave no sign that he had heard her implication, his face composed. This solid mask of calm quickly crumbled when the pink that usually tipped his ears began to trickle down into his earlobes, then to his cheeks, his jaw line, his voluminous head. The blush spread over his skin until the only visible part of his anatomy that remained powder blue was his nose, a blueberry perched on a crimson fleshed tomato.

Roxanne stifled a giggle that threatened to burst out of her chest; she had never seen anyone blush so furiously, and at only the mention of a kiss! However, as she pondered this, Roxanne remembered that Megamind spent the majority of his youth in a correctional facility, where she doubted the in-mates showed him any warmth. Even as a boy he was ostracized by his peers due to his appearance and evil habits. He had probably never held a girl's hand, let alone been _kissed_. Intellectually, he was more developed than most, but Megamind had the romantic experience of a pre-schooler.

After standing rigidly in place for about a minute with his face steaming red, Megamind managed to say though his teeth, "I should call Minion."

He prepared to beat a hasty retreat when Roxanne voiced aloud, "You've never been kissed." A flash of confirmation glinted in his eyes, but was quickly replaced with indignation.

"That," he spluttered, his hands placed huffily on his hips, "is pre_poi_sterous!"

"What is pre_pos_terous," Roxanne retorted, emphasizing the syllable he mispronounced, "is that you fear your captive so much. Really, I just _mention_ a kiss and your face turns beet red!"

He would not stand for such mockery! His blush swiftly disappeared and he narrowed his eyes, saying coldly, "You forget your _place_, Miss Ritchie."

Roxanne, fed up with Megamind's superiority complex, snapped back, "Just minutes ago, you told me that you appreciated my talents, that you wished I would join you! What happened to that?"

"I meant all of that," he insisted, his hands clasped behind his back as he advanced toward her, his staccato steps accenting his words. "In the professional world, you are nothing short of a treasure; but as a victim, you overstep your boundaries. The victim does not make a fool of the villain. The victim does not critique or analyze the villain. And the victim does not ask the villain for a kiss."

He was now only a few steps away, towering over Roxanne in her chair. A whirlwind of emotion swirled in her mind and she corrected him forcefully, "I wasn't asking, I was merely trying to prove a point despite my inhibitions. But _you_ allow your fears to send you running. Metro Man _never_ turns away from what scares him, not like you! You're a _coward_!"

Is that so? Megamind's face hardened with determination and he demanded roughly, "Is _this _cowardly?"

He gripped Roxanne by the biceps and powerfully lifted her to her feet, pressing his lips to hers. That shut her up. Roxanne had enough experience to identify a first kiss, going as far as to divide them into categories. Three were most common with first kisses: the tight lipped, Dry Kiss you give your grandma; the slobbery Wet Dog Kiss that has too much tongue; and the Busy Hands Kiss, when the kiss is just an excuse to feel you up. This kiss had none of those qualities.

It was surprisingly gentle, his mouth parted slightly, his pressure comfortable, and his eyes politely closed. However, what struck Roxanne was how he seemed to put feeling into it, although he denied any emotional connection. After the first few seconds of shock, Roxanne found herself pushing back and she impulsively placed her palms on his hard abdomen as she closed her eyes. He jerked back and held her at arm's length, startling her enough to make her eyes pop open. In contrast to the grogginess she felt, Megamind's eyes were bright and alert, boring deeply into hers.

"I am not the hero, Roxanne," he stated firmly, and before she could respond he pushed her back into a sitting position on the hard wooden chair, marching purposefully out of the room to fetch Minion.

Roxanne sat there with her eyes wide and her mouth gaping, absorbing what just happened. Although there were many thoughts whizzing about her head, she could only process this: Megamind used her name for the first time without attaching 'Ritchie' to the end of it. Once she had gotten over this revelation, she allowed herself to move on to the more pressing matter. She reviewed the action that lead up to the kiss and wondered how she had let herself slip so easily from being the seducer to the victim. Was it her fate to be the victim? She didn't want to constantly be taken advantage of by others…

Although when Megamind was kissing her, Roxanne wasn't totally against the idea of being taken advantage of.


	6. Escape Artist

_Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in Megamind. They are property of Dreamworks Studios._

_Well, the last chapter was…interesting. Let's see what happens next, shall we?_

Roxanne started in fright when she heard voices nearing her makeshift holding cell, doubled over as she tried to pick the lock of the cuffs around her ankles. Biting her lip, Roxanne gave the bobby pin a final desperate jerk and popped open the lock, hissing a quiet, "Yes!"

Roxanne made sure it appeared her feet were still chained before she sat up straight, discarding her bobby pin with a flick of her wrist. She struggled to hear the conversation on the opposite side of the door, and by straining her ears caught Minion's suggestion: "We should really fix the Brainbots' sound sensors, sir. I was whistling earlier and nearly got my fishbowl knocked off! They have an acute sensitivity to high-pitched sounds."

"Later, later; we have more vital issues," Megamind replied distractedly and Roxanne frowned, glaring at the floor. A moment later, Megamind and Minion burst through the door, the latter carrying a mass of heavy computer equipment. Minion placed his load on the floor beside Megamind's desk and stepped back, allowing his master to set up the mess of circuitry. It took Megamind less than 40 seconds to establish an internet connection, access a long distance communication frequency and get a clear image on the computer monitor. He smiled proudly, positive that Metro Man couldn't accomplish such a feat even using his super speed. Evil genius – 1, brainless hero – 0.

"Now," he barked, turning to Roxanne, "We merely have to contact your date and he will fly in to rescue you. I trust Metro Man will be willing to trade even control over Metrocity for you in that dress." He scrutinized Roxanne's appearance and her cheeks flared with rage. She was most _definitely_ over that kiss. Megamind was lower than scum, and Roxanne kicked herself for believing his lies.

"If you would kindly give us Metro Man's contact number, we'll give him a ring and make a deal," Megamind continued, looking at Roxanne expectantly. He_ still_ thought she was dating Metro Man? She had tried to explain _multiple times_ this wasn't the case, and this time she decided to let him to believe whatever he wanted. What he didn't know couldn't hurt him, and besides: the plot twist she had up her sleeve was too good to keep to herself.

"I wasn't going out with Metro Man tonight," Roxanne replied, smiling tightly at her captors stunned expressions. She paused to let the sentence sink in but both Megamind and Minion stared at her unblinkingly, unable to process her words. Gaining confidence, Roxanne clarified, "He's out of town on special business, and he won't be back for _days_."

Megamind could not believe it. How had he _missed_ that? There _must_ have been media coverage about this, but he spent at least two hours per day in prison watching the news and hadn't seen any news casts about Metro Man leaving. Granted, he mainly watched Roxanne's broadcasts while in captivity…but that was beside the point! Obviously the entire fiasco was _Minion's_ fault, for not keeping him informed about his nemesis's location. All his plans, wasted! It set his blood boiling when things didn't go his way, and his frustration built until he could no longer contain it.

"We'll just have to bring Metro Man to us," Megamind said decidedly, and raised his index finger dramatically. "Assemble the Brainbots, Minion! We are launching an attack on Metrocity!" He announced grandly and he turned to Roxanne, saying as he smiled humourlessly at her, "Perhaps _that_ will speed up our white-suited hero's return!"

The blood drained from Roxanne's face and her eyes widened. No no no, this wasn't what she meant to happen! She had to do something, or the safety of thousands of innocent people would be jeopardized all because of her! The problem was in order to save everyone else, she had to free herself first.

Roxanne looked around frantically for an escape route, and when a lone Brainbot floated aimlessly into her line of sight, she remembered what Minion had said earlier. This gave Roxanne an idea. When Megamind and Minion were discussing the image on the computer monitor with their backs to her, Roxanne raised her hands high above her head and took in a deep breath, releasing a shrill whistle that startled not only the Brainbot but also her captors. For a moment, the robot vibrated in place; then its eye whirled around, trying to find the source of the sound. Roxanne whistled again, jangling the chains of her hand cuffs. A bright red laser shot out of the Brainbot's eye and hit the length of chain between her hands, freeing her. Roxanne knew well enough not to stick around, and she quickly leapt from her chair, bolting for the door.

"Minion!" Megamind cried, and his assistant stretched out his arm to snatch her by the back of the skirt, just missing as she ducked out the door. Roxanne slammed the door shut and slid the deadbolt across before they could catch her, looking around wildly. That lock wouldn't keep them busy for long, so Roxanne kicked off her heels, dashing down the corridor and taking the next left. Head pounding, she entered the large main area of the lair where Megamind's biggest inventions and the majority of his vehicles were located. She also knew this was where a land line was. Roxanne screeched to a halt in front of the phone and grabbed the receiver, punching in the police force's phone number. The phone beeped in response and she cursed softly, slamming the receiver down only to pick it up a second later and select a line before dialling again.

"Come one, come on," Roxanne chanted under her breath, glancing over her shoulder to where Megamind and Minion would come from in seconds. Then, she a crackly voice said what could have been interpreted as either "Hello?" or "Marco Polo?"

"This is Roxanne Ritchie," the words tumbled out of her mouth as she watched for Megamind. "I've been captured by Megamind and I'm being held hostage at his most recent lair! The city is in terrible danger!"

"I'll be needing an address, ma'am," the officer replied slowly, stifling a yawn on the other end. Roxanne could faintly hear pounding footsteps. She gritted her teeth and pleaded, "Tell the head officer that Roxanne Ritchie has been captured by Megamind! I have to go!"

She smashed the receiver down and ran from the phone, quickly hiding behind the wheel of an enormous, dormant vehicle. The footsteps neared, and then her pursuers came to a halt in the room, making Roxanne's breath catch in her throat. Megamind and Minion conversed in breathless whispers, the occasional snippet reaching her ears.

"—where did she—?"

"—can't believe she knows about the Brainbots' sensor—"

"—been here enough, I suppose—"

"—think she's armed?"

Although Roxanne didn't catch everything, it was obvious they were talking about her and she crouched a little lower in her hiding place. If they found her, she wasn't sure what they'd do, but she didn't want to find out. The next sentence she heard clear as a bell:

"She's still here," Megamind concluded, his voice enigmatic and hushed. Sweat began to trickle down her back and Roxanne leaned back on her haunches, listening with her breath held. A chill went down her back when Megamind assured his minion, "Don't worry. We'll find her."

There was only the soft sound of footsteps for a few moments and Roxanne shifted in her crouch, wincing as her knees made a cracking sound. Bracing her hand on the textured surface of the tire in front of her, Roxanne peeked out from her hiding place and nearly fell backwards when she saw a tall, shiny, black boot less than a foot from her face, biting her tongue to hold in a shriek. Raising just her eyes, Roxanne could see a fragment of the underside of Megamind's pointed chin as he peered into the cab of the vehicle over her head. After a moment, he turned and walked away, calling to Minion in a stage whisper, "Anything?"

"Nothing here, sir," Minion answered and Megamind scowled, placing his hands on his hips as he studied the peeling paint on the floor. There was no _way_ she could have found the exit, it was disguised. He loudly inhaled through his nose then exhaled in a sigh, confused by her disappearance. His brow furrowed as he caught an oddly familiar scent, and he took a second breath through his nose. This time, he caught the faint floral smell of perfume, and turned on his heel, facing the vehicle he had inspected only moments before. Soundlessly, Megamind strode to the large armoured car and bent down beside the front wheel, craning his neck around it.

Roxanne gasped when she saw him and Megamind smiled sinisterly. His mouth opened, and he whispered one menacing syllable:

"_Boo_."


End file.
